Week 3 – Jeff Maness – October 27, 2019
Being one in marriage has nothing to do with chemistry and everything to do with commitment. Chemistry and passion might spark a relationship, but it doesn’t have the power to sustain in. So, what commitments lead to oneness in marriage?
When two people with chemistry come together, the neurotransmitters fire up the pleasure centers of the brain and trigger the hormones. Without chemistry, there is no attraction, and therefore no relationship. — www.datingtheone.com
Big Idea: Being one in marriage has nothing to do with chemistry and everything to do with commitment.
Big Question: What commitments lead to oneness in marriage?
Main Scripture: Genesis 2:18-25
Genesis 2:18 18 The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him.”
Genesis 2:19-20 19 So the Lord God formed from the ground all the wild animals and all the birds of the sky. He brought them to the man to see what he would call them, and the man chose a name for each one. 20 He gave names to all the livestock, all the birds of the sky, and all the wild animals. But still there was no helper just right for him.
Genesis 2:21-24 21 So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep. While the man slept, the Lord God took out one of the man’s ribs and closed up the opening. 22 Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib, and he brought her to the man. 23 “At last!” the man exclaimed. “This one is bone from my bone, and flesh from my flesh! She will be called ‘woman,’ because she was taken from ‘man.’” 24 This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.
Matthew 19:4-5 4 “Haven’t you read the Scriptures?” Jesus replied. “They record that from the beginning ‘God made them male and female.’” 5 And he said, “‘This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.’
1. There is a relational priority
It’s a forsaking of father and mother – not in respect of function, but in respect of habitation, and comparatively, in respect of affection. — Pulpit Commentary
2. There is a relational unity
The two shall be esteemed by themselves and others to be as entirely and inseparably united, and shall have as intimate and universal communion; as if they were one person, one soul, one body. — Matthew Poole Commentary
In an ultimate sense, marriage is about emptying ourselves entirely—both as individuals and as married couples—so that the other might flourish, so that they might experience God’s peace. – Kutter Callaway (Breaking The Marriage Idol)
3. There is a relational intimacy
Genesis 2:25 25 Now the man and his wife were both naked, but they felt no shame.
1 Corinthians 7:3-5 3 The husband should fulfill his wife’s sexual needs, and the wife should fulfill her husband’s needs. 4 The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over his body to his wife. 5 Do not deprive each other of sexual relations, unless you both agree to refrain from sexual intimacy for a limited time so you can give yourselves more completely to prayer. Afterward, you should come together again so that Satan won’t be able to tempt you because of your lack of self-control.
“Sex in marriage is a metaphor inside the metaphor itself. Marriage between a husband and wife is a metaphor of God’s desire to be one with humanity. It points to the ‘marriage’ between Christ and the Church. The covenant of sex in marriage is modeling what Christ bodily did for us on the cross. Jesus saying, ‘I am holistically giving and covenanting myself to you on the cross.’ So, we say that through our sex. But we also say to our spouses through sex, ‘This is how God wants to be one with you. He is the completer of you. He is the one who pursues you and desires you.’ We’ve over emphasized sex, but completely diminished it by not holding it up as this theological dance.” — Laurie Krieg