Week 4 – Jeff Maness – November 3, 2019
Big Idea: The practice of marriage without pursuing the purpose of marriage will always feel incomplete.
Big Question: What is the purpose of marriage?
Main Scripture: Ephesians 5:15-33
Marriage is not a lifelong attraction of two individuals to each other but a call for two people to witness together to God’s love. It is to understand that we are elected to build together a house for God in this world. – Henri Nouwen (Dutch theologian and pastor)
1. Marriage is a calling
Ephesians 5:15-20 15 So be careful how you live. Don’t live like fools, but like those who are wise. 16 Make the most of every opportunity in these evil days. 17 Don’t act thoughtlessly, but understand what the Lord wants you to do. 18 Don’t be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, be filled with the Holy Spirit, 19 singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs among yourselves, and making music to the Lord in your hearts. 20 And give thanks for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.
A. Marriage is a calling to the mission of God
So marriage and singleness are about more than who to take out on a Friday night or whether sex will or will not follow. It’s about God’s mission in the world. Or, to put it differently, what if the chief criteria for a future spouse were not sexual chemistry, a common set of personal interests and hobbies, or even emotional compatibility, but rather a capacity (and willingness) to collaborate in a lifelong project of caring for the outsider, the marginalized, and the oppressed? — Kutter Callaway (Breaking the Marriage Idol)
“God, what is the mode you want me to do the mission of making disciples? Single or married? Kids or no kids?” – Laurie Krieg
1 B. A calling to minister for God
Ephesians 5:21-30 21 And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. 22 For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23 For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of his body, the church. 24 As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything. 25 For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her 26 to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word. 27 He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault. 28 In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself. 29 No one hates his own body but feeds and cares for it, just as Christ cares for the church. 30 And we are members of his body.
Seek, serve and spoil your wife.
Luke 19:10 10 For the Son of Man came to seek and save those who are lost.
Mark 10:45 45 For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve others and to give his life as a ransom for many.
1 John 3:1a 1 See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God!
Romans 5:2 2 Because of our faith, Christ has brought us into this place of undeserved privilege where we now stand, and we confidently and joyfully look forward to sharing God’s glory.
Submit = I place under, or I put myself under someone’s authority.
Respect, rejoice with and relate to your husband.
Ephesians 5:33 33 So again I say, each man must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
Respect = To entertain a high esteem for him, being desirous of pleasing him in all things lawful, reasonable and proper. Honor.
Philippians 4:4 (NIV) 4 Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!
James 4:8a 8 Come close to God, and God will come close to you.
1 C. A calling to model the mystery of God
Ephesians 5:31-32 31 As the Scriptures say, “A man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.” 32 This is a great mystery, but it is an illustration of the way Christ and the church are one.